Happy Halloween! Here are 25 funny Halloween jokes by Boys’ Life readers that will make you scream with laughter. Do you know a funny Halloween joke? Click here to send it in.
Michael: What treat do eye doctors give out on Halloween?
Matthew: I don’t know. What?
Michael: Candy corneas.
Submitted by Michael and Matthew A., Elba, N.Y.
A photographer goes to a haunted castle determined to get a picture of a ghost. The ghost he encounters turns out to be friendly and poses for a snapshot. The happy photographer dashes to his studio, develops the film and…learns that the photos are underexposed and completely blank.
Moral to the story: The spirit is willing, but the flash is weak.
Submitted by Jacob S., Lebanon, Ore.
Jake: Why couldn’t the ghost see its mom and dad?
Philip: I don’t know.
Jake: Because they were trans-parents!
Submitted by Jacob C., O’Fallon, Ill.
Brandon: Which ghost is the best dancer?
Nolan: I don’t know.
Brandon: The Boogie Man!
Submitted by Chris S., Centennial, Colo.
Everett: What’s a ghoul’s favorite game?
Francisco: What?
Everett: Hide-and-ghost-seek.
Submitted by Everett C., Tequesta, Fla.
Jerry: Why do ghosts like to ride in elevators?
Woody: Why?
Jerry: It raises their spirits.
Submitted by Matthew R., Dix Hills, N.Y.
Joshua: What do you get if you cross Bambi with a ghost?
Belia: What?
Joshua: Bamboo.
Submitted by Joshua T., Cheltenham, Pa.
Tim: What is a ghost’s favorite dessert?
Tom: What?
Tim: Booberry pie.
Submitted by Joshua N., Napoleon, Ohio
Tom: What’s a ghost’s favorite room?
Jerry: I dunno.
Tom: The living room!
Submitted by Steven G., Virginia Beach, Va.
Tom Swiftie: “That ghost movie was horrible!” Tom booed.
Submitted by Zakir G., Los Angeles, Calif.
Aidan: What is a ghost’s favorite Cub Scout event?
Taylor: What?
Aidan: Boo and Gold.
Aidan: What is a witch’s favorite Cub Scout event?
Taylor: I give up.
Aidan: Brew and Gold.
Aidan: What is a werewolf’s favorite Cub Scout event?
Taylor: What?
Aidan: Pack meetings, of course!
Submitted by Aidan T., Mount Airy, Md.
A book never written: “Ghost Hunting” by E. Gadd.
Submitted by Jet S., Ooltewah, Tenn.
Jess: Why don’t ghosts like rain?
Thomas: Why?
Jess: It dampens their spirits!
Submitted by Jess W., Spartanburg, S.C.
Race: What is a goblin’s favorite cheese?
Nathan: What is it?
Race: Monster-ella!
Submitted by Daniel B., Tyler, Tex.
Joker: Why did the monster’s mother knit him three socks?
Harvey: I have no clue.
Joker: She heard he grew another foot!
Submitted by Matthew C., Gladstone, Mo.
Two monsters went to a party. Suddenly one said to the other, “A lady just rolled her eyes at me. What should I do?”
“Be a gentleman and roll them back to her.”
Submitted by Billy J., Hershey, Pa.
Jack: Whom do monsters buy their cookies from?
Jill: Who?
Jack: The Ghoul Scouts.
Submitted by Jack R., Lake Villa, Ill.
Sam: What is Dracula’s favorite circus act?
Ethan: Tell me.
Sam: He always goes for the juggler!
Submitted by Sam C., San Antonio, Tex.
Dale: What do you do if you want to learn more about Dracula?
Gayle: You join his fang club.
Submitted by Dale K., Somerset, Pa.
Bill: What can you say about a horrible mummy joke?
Bob: What?
Bill: It Sphinx!
Submitted by Eric H., San Diego, Calif.
Chris: What’s a vampire’s favorite fruit?
Taylor: I have no idea.
Chris: A necktarine!
Submitted by Christopher F., Wildwood, Mo.
Gracie: Why do vampires need mouthwash?
Selena: Why?
Gracie: Because they have bat breath.
Submitted by Gracie Y., Los Gatos, Calif.
A book never written: “Did a Vampire Bite Me?” by Chick Yerneck.
Submitted by Coleton M., Cary, N.C.
Bruce: What is a vampire’s favorite dance?
Kevin: I don’t know. What?
Bruce: The Fang-Dango.
Submitted by Zac D., Danville, Calif.
Trent: Why are vampires so easy to fool?
Brent: Why?
Trent: Because they’re suckers.
Submitted by Trenton G., Shaftsbury, Vt.
Eddie: What do you call a vampire that lives in a kitchen?
Red: What?
Eddie: Count Spatula.
Submitted by Sam M., Greensboro, N.C.
Tim: What would you get if you crossed a vampire and a teacher?
Tom: What?
Tim: Lots of blood tests!
Submitted by Tim T., Whitehall, N.Y.
Daffynition: Retreat—To get another piece of candy.
Submitted by Anthony P., Watkinsville, Ga.
Tom Swiftie: “I’m not eating too much candy,” Tom said sweetly.
Submitted by Kevin A., St. Louis, Mo.
I loved these jokes
what did the mother ghost say to her son dont spook in less you wear spookn to
hey i love one direction more that those jokes
i just write these down now i an going to use these for jokes thanks xx
why didnt the sceliton go swimming
i like the jokes there fang-tastic
Cool jokes everyone but i got one more
abby: “What did Isabella say 2 the ghost?”
Bay: “What??”
abby: ” Watcha Booo-ing???
I only like the joke about the monster rolling eyeballs back to a lady.
Cool jokes could use these for challenges!
cool jokes
These jokes made me physically ill.
Lol my mom thought these were hysterical
🎃👻happy Halloween!!
who ever says these are bad dosn’t know how to laugh
These jokes sure are a “scream”. [:D
ive got better ones like this !!!me:whats a skeletons favorite type of resturant zac:i dunno me: a joint!!!!
These jokes make me laugh out loud
this are not funny at all
yeah right!
dont be a hater
ha ha ha, very funny.
like the vampire jokes gunna use 3 this year:P
very funny
i love theses jokes they are absolutely hilarious
very funny i going to tell every one now
right with you
same thing with me
Some were funny but the rest did not make sence
There r to many jokes i cant keep track
they were pretty good well done
Hahahahahaha! That’s so corny! But they are funny oh so funny.
There funny
HA HA VERY FUNNY!
They stink!
I like your jokes
Too Funny!!!:)
Like’em!!!
funny
They Were Ok.
they alright
really liked laughed so much im using these for halloween 2011
Good ones!!!! :0)
Haha! Bringing these to the Pack Meeting tonight!!
Haha this makes me miss my Boy’s Life subscription.
I can’t wait to share these at our pack mtg tonight
funny funny funny funny funny funny funny
sooooo funny!
i looked at them and laughed but……..there was to many vampire jokes
ha ha
very amusing
ROFLOLCOPTER!
My mom saw them, and laughed so hard she couldn’t talk!
hee hee ha ha lol
hahahahahahahahahah(or) lol
iLike them!
WA HA HA HA HA HA!!!!!!!!!!
Ha!Ghost jokes!
funny so funny
this is so funny