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62 Funny Halloween Jokes and Comics

Happy Halloween! We dare you not to scream with laughter when you read these funny Halloween jokes by Boys’ Life readers. Do you know a funny Halloween joke? Click here to send in your joke.


halloween-1

Joe: What do you call wood when it’s scared?
Bob: I don’t know.
Joe: Petrified!
Joke submitted by Daniel B., Lincoln, Neb.
Comic by Daryll Collins


Michael: What treat do eye doctors give out on Halloween?
Matthew: I don’t know. What?
Michael: Candy corneas.
Joke submitted by Michael and Matthew A., Elba, N.Y.


A photographer goes to a haunted castle determined to get a picture of a ghost on Halloween. The ghost he encounters turns out to be friendly and poses for a snapshot. The happy photographer later downloads his photos and finds that the photos are underexposed and completely blank.

Moral to the story: The spirit is willing, but the flash is weak.
Joke submitted by Jacob S., Lebanon, Ore.


Comic by Scott Nickel


A book never written: “All That’s Left of Me” by Myra Maines.
Joke submitted by Kieran F., Emporia, Kan.


Brett: What do mummies like listening to on Halloween?
Brent: I don’t know.
Brett: Wrap music!
Joke submitted by Brent J., Upper Arlington, Ohio


Comic by Scott Nickel


Spencer: What plants like Halloween the most?
Tanner: Which ones?
Spencer: Bam-BOO!
Joke submitted by Tanner S., Tampa, Fla.


Bill: Why did the policeman ticket the ghost on Halloween?
McKenzie: Why?
Bill: It didn’t have a haunting license.
Joke submitted by Howard H., Newark, Calif.


halloween-1

Comic by Daryll Collins


Sarah: What are a ghost’s favorite rides at the fair?
Brian: Tell me.
Sarah: The scary-go-round and rollerghoster!
Joke submitted by Sarah O., Springfield, Mo.


Max: What would you find on a haunted beach?
Sam: I’m stumped.
Max: A sand-witch!
Joke submitted by Maxwell C.


Comic by Scott Nickel


John: Why didn’t the skeleton like the Halloween candy?
Mark: Why?
John: He didn’t have the stomach for it!
Joke submitted by John C., Houston, Texas


Sam: What do you call a cleaning skeleton?
Frank: I don’t know.
Sam: The “grim sweeper.”
Joke submitted by Sam M., Pittsburgh, Pa.


comic-1

Comic by Scott Nickel


Chris: What’s worse than being a five-ton witch on Halloween?
Jill: No clue. Hit me with it.
Chris: Being her broom!
Joke submitted by Christian H., Fredericksburg, Va.


Daffynition: Pocahontas — A card game that comes back to scare you.
Joke submitted by Omkar S., San Jose, Calif.


Comic by Thomastoons


Jake: Why couldn’t the ghost see its mom and dad?
Philip: I don’t know.
Jake: Because they were trans-parents!
Joke submitted by Jacob C., O’Fallon, Ill.


Darius: What part of the street do vampires live on?
Chad: I don’t know.
Darius: The dead end.
Joke submitted by Darius C., Columbia, Md.


halloween-2

Comic by Scott Nickel


Brandon: Which ghost is the best dancer?
Nolan: I don’t know.
Brandon: The Boogie Man!
Joke submitted by Chris S., Centennial, Colo.


Everett: What’s a ghoul’s favorite game on Halloween?
Francisco: What?
Everett: Hide-and-ghost-seek.
Joke submitted by Everett C., Tequesta, Fla.


Rich: Why do they put fences around graveyards?
Mitch: Tell me.
Rich: Because people are dying to get in!
Joke submitted by Richard D., Granville, Ohio


Jerry: Why do ghosts like to ride in elevators?
Woody: Why?
Jerry: It raises their spirits.
Joke submitted by Matthew R., Dix Hills, N.Y.


comic-2

Comic by Scott Nickel


Joshua: What do you get if you cross Bambi with a ghost?
Belia: What?
Joshua: Bamboo.
Joke submitted by Joshua T., Cheltenham, Pa.


Gavin: What do you call a tired skeleton on Halloween?
Connor: Beats me.
Gavin: The “grim sleeper.”
Joke submitted by Gavin H., Stoughton, Mass.


halloween-3

Comic by Scott Nickel


Tim: What is a ghost’s favorite dessert?
Tom: What?
Tim: Booberry pie.
Joke submitted by Joshua N., Napoleon, Ohio


Tom: What’s a ghost’s favorite room?
Jerry: I dunno.
Tom: The living room!
Joke submitted by Steven G., Virginia Beach, Va.


Comic by Scott Nickel


Kirk: Why do mummies have no friends?
Mike: Why
Kirk: Because they’re too wrapped up in themselves!
Joke submitted by Kirk J., Bothell, Wash.


Tom Swiftie: “That ghost movie was horrible!” Tom booed.
Joke submitted by Zakir G., Los Angeles, Calif.


comic-3

Comic by Thomastoons


Aidan: What is a ghost’s favorite Cub Scout event?
Taylor: What?
Aidan: Boo and Gold.
Aidan: What is a witch’s favorite Cub Scout event?
Taylor: I give up.
Aidan: Brew and Gold.
Aidan: What is a werewolf’s favorite Cub Scout event?
Taylor: What?
Aidan: Pack meetings, of course!
Joke submitted by Aidan T., Mount Airy, Md.


Stephen: What did the ghost say when the skeleton lied to him?
David: I haven’t a clue.
Stephen: “I can see right through you.”
Joke submitted by Stephen S., Knoxville, Tenn.


halloween-4

Comic by Jon Carter


A book never written: “Ghost Hunting” by E. Gadd.
Joke submitted by Jet S., Ooltewah, Tenn.


Jess: Why don’t ghosts like rain on Halloween?
Thomas: Why?
Jess:  It dampens their spirits!
Joke submitted by Jess W., Spartanburg, S.C.


Race: What is a goblin’s favorite cheese?
Nathan: What is it?
Race: Monster-ella!
Joke submitted by Daniel B., Tyler, Tex.


Joker: Why did the monster’s mother knit him three socks for Halloween?
Harvey: I have no clue.
Joker: She heard he grew another foot!
Joke submitted by Matthew C., Gladstone, Mo.


halloween-5

Comic by Scott Nickel


Two monsters went to a Halloween party. Suddenly one said to the other, “A lady just rolled her eyes at me. What should I do?”
“Be a gentleman and roll them back to her.”
Joke submitted by Billy J., Hershey, Pa.


Jack: Whom do monsters buy their cookies from?
Jill: Who?
Jack: The Ghoul Scouts.
Joke submitted by Jack R., Lake Villa, Ill.


Sam: What is Dracula’s favorite circus act?
Ethan: Tell me.
Sam: He always goes for the juggler!
Joke submitted by Sam C., San Antonio, Tex.


Dale: What do you do if you want to learn more about Dracula?
Gayle: You join his fang club.
Joke submitted by Dale K., Somerset, Pa.


halloween-6

Comic by Scott Nickel


Bill: What can you say about a horrible mummy joke?
Bob: What?
Bill: It Sphinx!
Joke submitted by Eric H., San Diego, Calif.


Chris: What’s a vampire’s favorite fruit?
Taylor: I have no idea.
Chris: A necktarine!
Joke submitted by Christopher F., Wildwood, Mo.


Gracie: Why do vampires need mouthwash?
Selena: Why?
Gracie: Because they have bat breath.
Joke submitted by Gracie Y., Los Gatos, Calif.


A book never written: “Did a Vampire Bite Me?” by Chick Yerneck.
Joke submitted by Coleton M., Cary, N.C.


halloween-7

Comic by Scott Nickel


Bruce: What is a vampire’s favorite dance?
Kevin: I don’t know. What?
Bruce: The Fang-Dango.
Joke submitted by Zac D., Danville, Calif.


Trent: Why are vampires so easy to fool?
Brent: Why?
Trent: Because they’re suckers.
Joke submitted by Trenton G., Shaftsbury, Vt.


Eddie: What do you call a vampire that lives in a kitchen?
Red: What?
Eddie: Count Spatula.
Joke submitted by Sam M., Greensboro, N.C.


Ben: What do you call a kind and considerate monster?
Jonathan: What?
Ben: A complete failure.
Joke submitted by Benjamin M., Rancho Cordova, Calif.
Comic by Daryll Collins


Tim: What would you get if you crossed a vampire and a teacher?
Tom: What?
Tim: Lots of blood tests!
Joke submitted by Tim T., Whitehall, N.Y.


Comic by Scott Nickel


Daffynition: Retreat — To get another piece of candy on Halloween.
Joke submitted by Anthony P., Watkinsville, Ga.


Tom Swiftie: “I’m not eating too much candy,” Tom said sweetly.
Joke submitted by Kevin A., St. Louis, Mo.


Do you know a funny Halloween joke? Click here to send us your jokes.

57 Comments on 62 Funny Halloween Jokes and Comics

  1. Cool jokes but some don’t make sense

  2. U go scouts!😉;)

  3. some I find boring

  4. some are sooooooo boring

  5. tyler j l-/ // October 9, 2015 at 1:48 pm // Reply

    these jokes gave me a migraine

  6. Necktarine is very original! 😄😂😮😆🍷🍹

  7. Leopardstar // October 4, 2015 at 6:11 pm // Reply

    I love all of these wonderful jokes!!!!

  8. Lol.i love your jokes!

  9. Diamond_0Gamer // September 30, 2015 at 6:15 pm // Reply

    Why do ghosts not have eyes because they would fall before they can see

  10. The jokes are weird but there creative.

  11. Love these jokes!!! I’m DIEING to hear another. Wait I have one.

    Q. Why didn’t the skeleton go to the ball?

    A. He did not have the guts.

  12. Your jokes are funny.

  13. these are really funny

  14. these jokes are rilly funny my sun rily liked the jokes i did to

  15. Why was 6 afraid of 7?
    Because seven ate nine!

  16. cool
    I don’t now where you get this from but its so cool

  17. why did the potato want to go to France? well DUH! he wanted to become a FRENCH FRY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  18. Lucy:Why did the raven cross the road?
    Freddy:why???
    Lucy:To prove he was no chicken.

  19. eh these jokes are ok, their pretty good, just not funny to me

  20. So lame

  21. i luv them so much i fell off my chair!

  22. the 2 ghouls! // October 31, 2014 at 11:51 am // Reply

    a lot of them were not at all funny and some of them did not make sense.!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! by bella and jEMMA

  23. Love lol 😻 🙊😖😆😆😆😂😭😂😂

  24. I’ve got another joke to add to the list: What do you get when you cross a Coker spaniel a poodle and a ghost : A Coker-Poodle-Boo!

  25. Sadie and Emily // October 31, 2014 at 9:36 am // Reply

    Good but bad

  26. I love these jokes. My favorite one is about the vampire and the mouthwash. What do you get when you cross my cat Brody and a jack-o-lantern costume? CUTENESS!!!!

  27. I can’t believe they came up with those!

  28. Funny joke’s

  29. The boogie man was funny

  30. Get lost

  31. Really funny

  32. FlyingMonkey99 // October 28, 2014 at 5:41 pm // Reply

    These jokes are hilarious

  33. I’ve got one –

    What do u get when you come across a vampire and a snowman ????

    Frostbite!!!!!

  34. Hola, Señor // October 28, 2014 at 1:44 pm // Reply

    Funny!

  35. so funny keep it coming

  36. These r so funny

  37. Love it

  38. These are going to be good for my class

  39. HA!!!!!! CAN’T STOP LAUGHING!!!!!!!!!!!

  40. My friend doesn’t like these jokes but I do.

  41. i love these jokes

  42. nice. how do 9 or 10 year olds come up with these amazing jokes

  43. Well i know my new jokes

  44. I think some of these Jokes are a dead-end. Actually most of them are pretty lively! Sorry guys, I think its time to burry my puns before I dig my own grave even deeper.

  45. I just love puns.

  46. flaming good jokes

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