Huge chicken barbecue event

Dear Pedro, Instead of selling popcorn, our troop raises money every year by holding a huge chicken barbecue event in the fall. We’ve been doing this for more than 30 years. The meal includes a half chicken, roll and potato salad. Would you like to buy a ticket?
– Matthew M., Greensboro, N.C.

Thanks for the offer, Matthew, but burros don’t eat chicken. Now if you were serving something tasty, like tumbleweed tacos, that would be a different story. But I don’t think you’d sell more than one ticket — to me.