-- Ricky B., Scottsdale, Ariz.

Uniforms aren't made for my, uh, physique, Ricky. But I do have a neckerchief somewhere around the corral. And I do look good in that.

pick?

-- David S., Redmond, Wash.

The stuff on the list isn't on my menu, David. Hay, clover, tumbleweed tacos -- that's what I call chow!

-- Ryan P., College Station, Tex.

Well, of course, Ryan. You've got to quake the flakes to make the shakes.

-- Dan T., Miami, Fla.

The Boss says hauling the mailbag is my hobby and eating and sleeping are my job, Dan. He's really tough to please. But the sun is nice and warm outside and a siesta would be sweet.

-- Robbie D., Norwalk, Conn.

The grass is the same, Robbie. The view is different.

-- Hal D., Underwood, Minn.

Go to our home page and click on "Contact Us." You'll get list of different editorial items. Or you can drop us a line, Hal -- but then I have to haul the letter to the editor.

-- Jack C., Tucson, Ariz.

It's been a long time since I clip-clopped around the Tooth of Time, Jack, but I still like to look at photos. The packs were heavy; the scenery is great.

-- Bob D. Scrubbley, Mass.

Thanks, Bob, but I always tell The Boss he's da best (at least to his face).

-- Andrew L., Cohasset, Mass.

Philmont is a Scout ranch, Andrew, and you'll see girls on the trails with Venture crews (all-female and co-ed).

-- Jack F., Fort Worth, Tex.

If I crane my neck I can see it from my corral, Jack. The museum frowns on four-legged visitors, but I hear it's very cool. Plan that trip.

-- Robert S., Riverside, Calif.

Actually, they're burroshoes, Robert. My hooves are made out of the same stuff your fingernails are made of -- not much feeling there. And I don't feel dressed without them.

-- Eric M., Worcester, Mass.

Sure, Eric. I've posed for photographs wearing a Scout neckerchief. The Boss kept trying to wipe off taco crumbs with it though (annoying). I never said I was a dainty eater.

-- Ryan C., Evansville, Ind.

I am thankful that I don't have to haul those heavy packs at Philmont anymore, Ryan. Since The Boss will be home eating turkey, I'll probably munch an extra amount of hay and take a nap -- the perfect day.

-- Noah H., Pine Bluff, Ark.

The Boss says I act like I'm retired now, Noah. I live out in the corral. (You don't think a mailburro would live in a house, do you?)

-- Andrew D., Brookfield, Wis.

I'll pass it along to The Boss, Andrew. We ran an article on the Northern Tier  High Adventure Base's Okpik winter camping program in September ("Northern Stars"). The camping and fishing is a bit different than it is in warm weather. Brrrr.

-- Skyler H., Redding, Calif.

I spent plenty of time hauling packs at Philmont, Skyler. I've never forgotten it. The scenery is great (but the loads were really heavy).

-- Cody N., Las Vegas, Nev.

I've been here a loooooong time, Cody, and I feel right at home. And The Boss says nobody else needs a floppy-eared hayburner.

-- Austin W., Sanford, N.C.

I can't, Austin, but you can. Send us some funny jokes. Get your friends to send us funny jokes. I just hee-haw at them, I don't make them up.

-- Bandman, Good Hope, Ill.

Punkin chunkin' looks like a great time, Bandman. But after reading the article The Boss said he could use a trebuchet to really get me moving, so I'm not talking about it. Burro blastin' is not my idea of a great time.

-- Damon M., Soddy Daisy, Tenn.

I have lots of relatives, Damon, but that plush donkey isn't one of them. Still, I'm honored you named the toy after me. I'll bet The Boss doesn't get cute, cuddly things named for him.

-- Joseph H., Cupertino, Calif.

"Collecting" will be back, Joseph. Keep letting us know about the cool collections you put together.

-- Donnie G., Midland, Mich.

He looks like he's dressed up for Halloween every day, Donnie. Hee-haw!

-- Donnie G., Midland, Mich.

Who needs a costume when you look like I do, Donnie? Nobody hands out candied cactus, so I'll just stay in my corral and watch the spooky-looking kids walk by.

-- Matt F., Laramie, Wyo.

I told The Boss that I wished I had a tongue like a frog rather than this tail to get rid of pesky insects, Matt, and I guess it started his creative juices flowing.

-- Cooper S., Manassas, Va.

Have your counselor go to this site and check out your letter, Cooper. You can write to the editors at Boys' Life, Boy Scouts of America, 1325 West Walnut Hill Lane, P.O. Box 152079, Irving, TX 75015-2079. Or you can write to me. The Boss reads all my mail -- what a busybody!

-- John J., Moraga, Calif.

Ahem. OK, John, here's the official explanation: The Merit Medal is presented to Scouts who have performed an act of meritorious service above and beyond what is normally expected of a youth or an adult member of the BSA. The Medal of Heroism is presented to Scouts and Scouters who have saved a life at little or no personal risk. The Honor Medal is presented to Scouts and Scouters who have shown courage in attempting to save a life with personal risk. The Honor Medal with crossed palms is presented in rare cases where a Scout or Scouter has attempted to save a life at great personal risk and demonstrated exceptional heroism.

-- Derek V., Mesa, Ariz.

All right, guys, I've said I'm not sharing my secret family recipes. I'm sure The Boss likes me (everybody likes me). I'm not sure if he enjoys working with me. He certainly makes funny faces and turns funny colors when he asks me to get to work. And he says nobody in his right mind would eat the stuff I whip up. If you saw his wardrobe, you'd realize he doesn't have good taste, though.

-- Chance C., Okinawa, Japan

All of our articles are commissioned, Chance. The Boss says we have high standards (I'm not sure how I got in here), so we let the professionals handle it. But we encourage you to submit jokes or items for "Hobby Hows," "Collecting," "Ask Us Anything!," "Ask  the Gear Guy," "Ask the Games Guru," and the "Readers' Page," or nominate someone for "BL Headliners." Oh, yeah, and let us know if your unit is planning a cool outing. Alfalfa milkshakes didn't make me color blind, I was born that way. But The Boss says they're awful, and I'm not to inflict them on anyone else. I think they're yummy, and I'm off to have one now. Thanks for mentioning it.

-- Nick T., Houston, Tex.

If it's more than a few years old, you can't get it from me, Nick. But here's a tip on back issues: If you know the month and year and what the article is about, send your request to Boys' Life, Boys Scouts of America, P.O. Box 152079, 1325 West Walnut Hill Lane, Irving, TX 75015-2079, and we'll send you the pages you're looking for. Am I a helpful guy, or what?

-- Tom I., Oakdale, Minn.

Flattery won't get you my secret recipes, Tom.

-- Ty S. Woodlawn, Ill.

Sorry, Ty, most of those cool cars are made overseas and not available here.  And the price tags aren't burro feed either, if you know what I mean. Go to www.boyslife.org/links/cars for more information on these dealers.

-- Local Boy Big Daddy Z., Waiphau, Hawaii

One of the guys from the cantina once brought some cactus cider and an ocotillo- and creosote-leaf cupcake out to my corral (that's the extent of my camping out). The Boss said it was so original that no one else would touch it, L.B.B.D.Z.

-- Stephen B., Gretna, Neb.

I wouldn't say it's my nerves he's been on, Stephen.

-- Gavin L., Sumner, Wash.

Pee Wee mostly makes me laugh, Gavin. Maybe some day one of his big ideas will work out.

-- Gautam R., Danville, Calif.

We burros are an amazing lot, Gautam, but I don't hike unless I'm on a food search. The Boss says dragging the mailbag counts as a job and that I can work out on my own time (ain't gonna happen).

-- Aaron M., Frisco, Tex.

Blow straight and steady, Aaron, and keep it to one side. I didn't ask The Boss about this one -- he only blows hard. Hee-haw!

-- Kyle F., Baltimore, Md.

Falling interest knocks merit badges off the list, Kyle, and sometimes merit badges are incorporated into more comprehensive badges. For example, many of the old agricultural merit badges have been merged into Animal Science and Plant Science.

-- Lew A., Culver City, Calif.

Even The Boss doesn't work all time, Lew. And when The Boss is away...well, let's just say I go into a very relaxed mode.

-- Dan S., Louisville, Ky.

The season's over for the guy I root for, Dan -- he's Shelley, the mascot of the Texas League's Arkansas Travelers (and a fellow equine, of course.)

-- Carl J., Lake Oswego, Ore.

Thanks for the recommendation, Carl. Oh, funny, Boss. He says he can calculate how fast I'm moving using a sundial.

-- Lips the Bugler, Saratoga Springs, Utah

The principles embodied in the Scout Oath and Law are what all Scouts are expected to strive toward, Lips. Eagle Scouts are supposed to set an example for younger Scouts to follow.

-- Zach L., Dallas, Ga.

Donkeys (or burros) are scientifically called equus asinus -- the domestic ass. Since I one of kind, I'm shooting for the special classification of mailburrricus magnificus. Nobody seems interested, though.

-- Matthew M., Greensboro, N.C.

Thanks for the offer, Matthew, but burros don't eat chicken. Now if you were serving something tasty, like tumbleweed tacos, that would be a different story. But I don't think you'd sell more than one ticket -- to me.

-- Stephen P., Asheville, N.C.

He signed up the get the word-of-the-day emails that we recommend in the October issue, Stephen. The first word he got was "cantankerous." How perfect is that?

-- Sam W., Pittsburgh, Pa.

I've worn my burro shoes down to the nails carrying packs on hikes, Sam, but none of the trails used to be railroad beds. Good luck with your hike; I'll stay here and tote the mail on the carpet.

-- Ryan A., San Diego, Calif.

The Boss says I'll sprout wings before I get a driver's license, Ryan. Oh well, I'm the only mailburro. maybe I'll be the only airburro.

-- Todd S., Austin, Tex.

Every burro's favorite song is "Donkey Serenade," Todd.

-- Samuel H., Lynchburg, Va.

To qualify for alternate requirements, a Scout must have a certified physical or mental disability that is permanent. I just haul the mail, Samuel, I don't make the rules.

-- Alexander B., Dartmouth, Mass.

Thanks for the recommendation, Alexander. My tail is a great bug swatter, but my paddling skills are nonexistent.

-- Ben F., Streamwood, Ill.

I can't get The Boss to do much of anything, Ben, except turn funny colors and raise his voice.

-- Ian S. East Lyme, Conn.

Both trips sound great for Scouts, Ian. I prefer the adventure of munching hay in my own corral and then taking a nap.

-- Chris A., Atlanta, Ga.

Ummmm, I guess a candied cactus cupcake, Chris. They're a little hard to find, though.

-- Noah C., College Park, Md.

Yeah, Noah, the Rangers said I was "balky." I thought of it as using fine judgment.

-- Michael R., North Richland Hills, Tex.

I'm glad you find it interesting, Michael. It's a lot easier being a character in those games than it is for me to play them. The Boss says my hoof-eye coordination is only good when I'm eating.

-- Rich D., Portland, Ore.

Sailors call the back of the boat the stern, Rich. The Boss had to explain that one to me too. When I get around boats, I turn the color of cactus cider.

-- Rachel W., Madison, Wis.

Send it in, Rachel—I'll definitely accept it (or rather The Boss will). The contest is open to all Boys' Life readers.

-- Randall H., Tucson, Ariz.

Um, no, Randall, jelly beans aren't part of a mailburro's diet. But The Boss keeps a jar full of them on his desk, and I see him reaching in there all the time. They must be tasty.

-- Nick C., Detroit, Mich.

Sometimes I can sleep with my eyes open, Nick. Don't tell anyone, though.

—Alex Y., Huntington Beach, Calif.

And your email has brought joy to my heart, Alex. I think I'll go show it to The Boss and watch him make a funny face.

—Austyn P., Okmulgee, Okla.

You're welcome, Austyn. I'm motivated to go eat something green about now.

-- Lance E., Huntington Beach, Calif.

The Boss really enjoys those letters, and I get to answer some of them here and in "Hitchin' Rack" in the magazine, Lance. The best letters tell us what readers think about the magazine—what they like, what they learned, what they want to see more of (especially me).

-- John G., Erie, Pa.

Pee Wee has a live-action cartoon on this site—"Pee Wee Harris Looks at Safety." Check it out, John. I'll ask The Boss about about past strips, but don't hold your breath. He'll say I'm just trying to hog the spotlight.

-- Cole G., Conyers, Ga.

I can help with the arrows, Cole. Instructions on how to make them are included in "BL Workshop" on this site. I'm told it's hard to make a good bow (like I'd ever try), but I'm sure you can find instructions somewhere.

-- Greyson N., Matthews, N.C.

I told The Boss we should have used his face instead of Abraham Lincoln's to make it really funny. He didn't think that was funny. Oh, well. If you want to keep working on your drawing skills, Greyson, we show you how to draw cartoon dogs at "BL Workshop" on this site.

-- Gabby, Livingston, N.J.

If I did that, Gabby, it would give you sinko de Pedro -- and that would be nothing to celebrate. I don't miss any meals (believe me).

-- Ryan G. Sandimas, Calif.

We print the best ones you guys send in, Ryan, both here on our Web site and in the magazine. Keep 'em coming. (Sometimes I have to explain them to The Boss—that guy's funny bone can be hard to find.)

-- Bob K., Capitan, N.M.

There's not a procedure yet, Bob, because they're not available. The Boss says that will happen before too much longer.

-- Ian P., Seoul Korea

I am pretty remarkable, aren't I, Ian? That's why The Boss says there's nobody like me. He shakes his head when he says it, though.

-- Eric S., Woodbury, Minn.

Some Web sites provide information about good projects, Eric, but needed projects only can be identified by the people you want to help. Talk with the people who charter your Scout unit, administrators at your school, officials in your community or your religious institution. That's where you'll identify a need. Then you can come up with a plan.

-- Josh J., Richmond Hill, Ga.

C'mon, Josh, The Boss isn't really mean. He just expects me to stay focused and work all the time. I have so many distractions, what with my belly grumbling and my poor burro bod needing a nap. He says I take enough milkshake breaks without him giving me more. And as for his picture, well ... let's just say The Boss isn't suitable for framing.

-- Chance C., Seoul, South Korea

Beats me, Chance -- I use a mix. The Boss says it is the foulest gunk that's ever been spilled on him, so I may be a one-burro market for the stuff.

-- Ian P., Seoul, South Korea

The Boss says my appendages sure don't look (or work) like his, Ian, so I can't call them hands and feet.

-- Brian V., San Jose, Calif.

The merit badge pamphlets all have a table of contents, Brian. Most of them aren't really hefty enough to warrant an index (or so I'm told). I guess my rank is mailburro, and I've advanced about as high as I can go.

-- Michael M., Brentwood, Calif.

Canoes and I don't mix well, Michael -- my center of gravity is too high. But if you want to have an adventure like that, talk with your senior patrol leader and Scoutmaster and see if your troop can plan the outing. You never know unless you ask -- that's how I got my last alfalfa milkshake. Well, maybe it was more of a whine than an ask. I think The Boss got it for me just to get me to be quiet.

-- Kyle M., Vienna, Va.

The Boss says we have more stories about Scouts than we have room to print, Kyle. But we do have some cool podcasts of SIA on this site. Check them out.

-- Nathan L., Spring, Tex.

And now your name is again appearing on the Boys’ Life Web site, Nathan -- in my e-bag! If you guys will write to me, your name too can appear on the Boys’ Life Web site. That IS fun and cool.

-- Ryan P. Milwaukee, Wis.

We’re glad you like it, Ryan. The Boss has been itchy for weeks to get it done, and now he’s taking the day off. So I am too, kind of.

-- Nicholas G., Auburn, Calif.

I think water's good for drinking only, but I'll pass your suggestion along to The Boss (I'm sure he'll like it).

-- Chad S., Burnsville, Md.

I may not be the best burro to ask that question, Chad.  The Boss is always handing me a to-do list -- load the mailbag, deliver the mail, reload the mailbag. Maybe a to-do list would work for you.

-- Richard W., Grand Junction, Colo.

Some people look for help, some people don't. I'd love for someone to help me tote the mail (but nobody ever offers). But The Boss doesn't ever seem to want my help running the magazine. Maybe you could serve as a role model by living by the ideals of Scouting and displaying your Scout skills.

-- Parth A., Atlanta, Ga.

Almost all jokes are recycled in some form for decades, Parth. Of course, I'll hee-haw again at a joke I heard yesterday.

-- Steve M., Mineral Wells, W.V.

I can't do either or I'd fall down, Steve. Why don't you check with your Scoutmaster on this one? Your troop members should all do the same thing. (A T-shirt seems a little informal for a salute, though.)

-- Tyler B., Sissonville, W.V.

If you need more wiggle room, Tyler, why don't you consider getting a small tent for yourself? One that repels water well.

-- Wilson V., Lake Park, Minn.

They're food for birds and bats and spiders, Wilson. Other than that, you've got me.

—Travis K., Camdenton, Mo.

Because computers don't have much to say. Seriously, though, Travis, we've run articles about Scouts and computers, and The Boss says we'll do it again.

-- Evan D., Linden Mich.

I doubt it, Evan. If some of the requirements seem physically imposing, you might wait until you're a little older, bigger and stronger before you tackle the merit badge. I couldn't have hauled this mailbag when I was a foal.

-- Ricky G., Hanover Park, Ill.

They haven't changed, Ricky. You guys are asking the questions. If you would like to ask them a camping or Scouting question, just click on "Contact Us" below and then click on "Ask Us Anything."

-- Timothy M., Merrick, N.Y.

I'm showing this to The Boss right now, Timothy. Maybe he'll forget that my latest wacky adventure involved me dragging the mailbag across his favorite sunglasses.

-- Kyle A., St. Augustine, Fla.

That's a badge I would definitely earn -- if I could cook. An Eating merit badge would be even better. I guess they figure every Scout is going to be hungry and want to whip up some tasty chow, Kyle.

-- Nicolas P., Littleton, Mass.

Sure, if it's not too far past, Nicolas. An issue is $3.95. The more recent the issue, the odds are better that we have it.

-- Alexander T., Clarence Center, N.Y.

Don't worry, Alexander, we'll keep you thinking and grinning. Plus, I need the job. I don't think anyone else will keep me in tumbleweed tacos and alfalfa milkshakes for toting the mailbag.

-- Richard Mc.C, Lititz, Pa.

Actually, Richard, I would believe it. I've been here a lot longer than 11 years, and you wouldn't believe the changes I've seen. The Boss says we will always try to publish the best possible magazine for you guys.

-- Gus H., Oskaloosa, Kan.

Gee, Gus, you don't think folks would find it odd to see an undersized (but handsome) burro sitting in the bleachers?

-- JaMatt, Nashville, Tenn.

Caves are dark and spooky -- no place for a skittish mailburro. But I think it's great you want to help keep them graffiti free, JaMatt.

-- Peyton H., Pegram, Tenn.

Good for you, Peyton. It's always good to find time for things you enjoy. I wish I could type these responses and nap at the same time. Of course, I can't really type. Oh well, maybe I'll just go take a nap -- something I really enjoy.

-- Connar B., Elizabethtown, Pa.

The Boss says I mainly collect fleas, Connar, but he's just joking around (I think). My main hobbies are eating and sleeping, of course. But The Boss says those aren't really hobbies for me, they're an art form.

-- Alex B., Cedar Bluff, Va.

Why don't you check with the organization that sponsors your troop to see if they need a project completed, Alex? Or your school, or your place of worship, or your town? Asking around might get your brain cells working. Alfalfa milkshakes put my brain in gear, but they don't seem to work for anyone else.

-- Jonathan B., Mansfield, Mass.

If you can hold on until our October issue, Jonathan, we'll give you another article on cars. In the meantime, there are some great photos of classic American cars on this site. Just type in "classic cars" in our search engine and enjoy the slide show. All I can do is look at them. I'll never get a driver's license.

-- Lyle H., Westerville, Neb.

Good luck with your ambition, Lyle. You'd better learn how to draw too. There's a cool column on how to draw cartoon dogs in the "BL Workshop" section of this site.