Chris: I thought you were going bear hunting.
Matt: I was, but I only made it as far as the highway.
Chris: What happened?
Matt: Well, I saw a road sign that said “Bear Left,” so I came home.
Tom Swiftie: “I love hitting piñatas,” Tom said bashfully.
Ryan: Why did the dinosaur cross the road?
Bryan: Beats me.
Ryan: Because chickens didn’t exist yet!
Tom Swiftie: “What’s the first letter of your name?” Tom asked initially.
A boy enters a barbershop and the barber whispers to his customer, “This is the dumbest kid in the world. Watch and I’ll prove it to you.”
The barber holds a dollar bill in one hand and two quarters in the other, then calls the boy over and asks, “Which do you want, son?”
The boy takes the quarters and leaves.
“What did I tell you?” says the barber. “That kid never learns!”
Later, when the customer leaves, he sees the same boy coming out of the ice cream store. “Hey, son! Why did you take the quarters instead of the dollar bill?”
The boy licks his cone and replies, “Because the day I take the dollar, the game is over!”
Adam: What’s the difference between a toothpick and a chainsaw?
Ben: I don’t know.
Adam: If you don’t know, you better not pick your teeth anytime soon!