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30 Funny Back-To-School Jokes

Summer vacation is over, and that’s no laughing matter. But you can go back to the classroom with a smile on your face, thanks to these funny jokes about school sent in by Boys’ Life readers. Do you know a funny joke? Click here to send it to us.

school-feature

Luke comes home from his first day of school, and his mother asks, “What did you learn today?”

“Not enough,” Luke replies. “They said I have to go back tomorrow.”

Submitted by Luke C., Somers, N.Y.


Nate: Why was school easier for cave people?
Kate: Why?
Nate: Because there was no history to study!

Submitted by Nathaniel R., Glendale, Wis.


A book never written: “The Best Subject in School” by Jim Class.

Submitted by Ian B., Howell, N.J.


David: Why did the broom get a poor grade in school?
Dan: I don’t know. Why?
David: Because it was always sweeping during class!

Submitted by David L., Hicksville, N.Y.


Comic by Scott Nickel


Luke: Why did the M&M go to school?
Stan: I’m stumped.
Luke: Because he really wanted to be a Smartie!

Submitted by Luke C., Somers, N.Y.


Chad: Why do magicians do so well in school?
Josh: I don’t know. Why?
Chad: They’re good at trick questions.

Submitted by Chad N., Firestone, Colo.


Jacob: Why was the teacher wearing sunglasses to school?
Leonard: Why?
Jacob: She had bright students!

Submitted by Jacob B., South Bend, Ind.


A book never written: “High School Math” by Cal Q. Luss.

Submitted by Josh A., Los Angeles, Calif.


A book never written: “When Does School Start?” by Wendy Belrings.

Submitted by Alex M., Ashland, Mass.


Joe: What’s the king of all school supplies?
Moe: I don’t know. What?
Joe: The ruler.

Submitted by Connor B., Metairie, La.


Tom Swiftie: “We have too many quizzes in school!” Tom said testily.

Submitted by Brian C., Snohomish, Wash.


Teacher: Class, we will have only half a day of school this morning.
Class: Hooray!
Teacher: We will have the other half this afternoon.

Submitted by Kyle S., Chesapeake, Va.


Stevie: Hey, Mom, I got a hundred in school today!
Mom: That’s great. What in?
Stevie: A 40 in Reading and a 60 in Spelling.

Submitted by Zachary D. G., Rutherford, N.J.


Hunter: What has given Mr. Bubbles nightmares since elementary school?
Josh: Beats me.
Hunter: Pop quizzes!

Submitted by Sean G., Kailua, Hawaii


What kind of school do you go to if you’re…
…an ice cream man? Sundae school.
…a giant? High school.
…a surfer? Boarding school.
…King Arthur? Knight school.

Submitted by Ryan K., North Platte, Neb.


Mom: What did you do at school today?
Mark: We did a guessing game.
Mom: But I thought you were having a math exam.
Mark: That’s right!

Submitted by Adam P., Wichita, Kan.


Teacher: Donald, what is the chemical formula for water?
Donald: H-I-J-K-L-M-N-O.
Teacher: What are you talking about?
Donald: Yesterday you said it was H to O.

Submitted by Caleb R., Jackson, Mich.


Teacher: Daniel, I’ve had to send you to the principal every day this week. What do you have to say for yourself?
Daniel: I’m glad it’s Friday!

Submitted by Martin R., Belmont, Mass.


Phil: What makes a Cyclops such an effective teacher?
Cheryl: I don’t know.
Phil: He has only one pupil.

Submitted by Colin C., Kansas City, Mo.


Teacher: Where are the Great Plains located?
Tommy: At the great airports!

Submitted by Nicholas G., South Range, Wis.


Teacher: If you had 13 apples, 12 grapes, 3 pineapples and 3 strawberries, what would you have?
Billy: A delicious fruit salad.

Submitted by Harry B., Longmeadow, Mass.


Math teacher: A man from Los Angeles drove toward New York at 250 miles per hour and a man from New York drove toward Los Angeles at 150 m.p.h. Where did they meet?
Johnny: In jail!

Submitted by Glenn J., Santa Ana, Calif.


Teacher: Tommy, can you tell us where the Declaration of Independence was signed?
Tommy: Yes, ma’am. At the bottom.

Submitted by Luke M., Morganton, N.C.


Jordan: My teacher says I have to write more clearly.
Mom: That’s a good idea, Jordan.
Jordan: No, it’s not. Then she’ll know I can’t spell.

Submitted by Jordan R., Nashville, Tenn.


Peter: What’s the difference between a teacher and a train?
Ted: What?
Peter: A teacher says, “Spit out that gum!” and a train says, “Chew! Chew!”

Submitted by Ted S., Lisle, Ill.


Teacher: Can anyone give me a sentence with a direct object?
Student: You are pretty.
Teacher: What’s the direct object?
Student: A good report card.

Submitted by Samuel E., Coweta, Okla.


Teacher: Why can’t you work in an orange juice factory?
Student: I don’t know. Why?
Teacher: Because you can’t concentrate!

Submitted by Caleb S., Mount Vernon, Mo.


Johnny: Teacher, would you punish me for something I didn’t do?
Teacher: Of course not.
Johnny: Good, because I didn’t do my homework.

Submitted by Alex D., Chevy Chase, Md.


John: Knock, knock.
Justin: Who’s there?
John: Gladys.
Justin: Gladys, who?
John: Gladys the weekend—no homework!

Submitted by John S., Farmington, Ga.


Teacher: Why did you eat your homework, Joe?
Joe: Because I don’t have a dog.

Submitted by Austin C., Bowie, Md.


57 Comments on 30 Funny Back-To-School Jokes

  1. So funny

  2. Super very funny. I loved these😉😉😉😉😉😆

  3. All are funny

  4. Nice jokes

  5. creative gamer 123 // April 22, 2018 at 3:48 pm // Reply

    hah i like the m&m one

  6. pinkypolish // March 21, 2018 at 2:25 am // Reply

    aha a bit cheesyyy, the jokes were quite funny but not the best that i have seen xD

  7. SuperCellular // February 26, 2018 at 3:01 pm // Reply

    Wonderful! Super Funny and we LOVE YOU! Super Cellular & The Microheroes!

  8. Super’b very funny

  9. very very very very funny

  10. i laughed xo much until i forgot that am in a meeting

  11. these jokes are the best jokes i ever heard thanks

  12. I love it

  13. Hate school lovejokes!

  14. Wow! Really finny and real.

  15. my dog only eats subway sandwiches

  16. RABBID GOES BWAH // August 30, 2017 at 3:48 pm // Reply

    I like the comic

  17. Hog Riders of the Lost Ark // August 26, 2017 at 6:35 pm // Reply

    I,m Homeschooled 🙂

  18. natebot 1000tdm // August 20, 2017 at 7:20 pm // Reply

    loved the first joke😘🤗😍😍

  19. undiscovered // August 18, 2017 at 9:35 am // Reply

    good jokes my teacher will luv them! 🙂

  20. NICE JOKES

  21. NOT TO FUNNY

  22. funny nice lol

  23. Doubledubs // June 23, 2017 at 9:35 am // Reply

    pretty funny

  24. Nice

  25. Very boring

  26. HAHAHAHA

  27. Undertale Fan // April 24, 2017 at 7:37 pm // Reply

    Good Punny Jokes. Sans the skeleton would probably love these jokes, too!

  28. KING AWESOME // April 16, 2017 at 6:45 pm // Reply

    GOOD JOKES GUYS HAHAHAHAH

  29. Very funny .I’m still laughing ha ha ha!

  30. HILARIOUS JOKES

  31. 🙂🙂🙂🙂🙂 // February 7, 2017 at 1:25 pm // Reply

    HHHHAAAA MOST ARE JOKES FOR EVERYWHERE ELSE ARE CORNY BUT I’M LAUGHING MY HEAD OFF AT THESE

  32. Awesome

  33. THIS IS FUNNY

  34. terrible puns

  35. wow great collection of jokes………..nice

  36. interesting and funny

  37. Very Nice & Funny

  38. Cute girl .. // October 5, 2016 at 7:16 am // Reply

    They are good………….

  39. Cute girl .. // October 5, 2016 at 7:15 am // Reply

    very funny !!!!!!I like them …………

  40. So funny

  41. Nice collection of jokes!

  42. hi whats up // August 23, 2016 at 4:09 pm // Reply

    nice i cant make up a good joke to save my life

  43. this is FUNNY!

  44. They were so funny!!!!!!!!

  45. qwertyuiop😀😀😁🐱🐈👑 // August 14, 2016 at 12:33 pm // Reply

    These are very good jokes!!!!!!!!

  46. qwertyuiop😀😀😁🐱🐈👑 // August 14, 2016 at 12:32 pm // Reply

    Very funny jokes. I’ll use some.

  47. Totes Funny i laughed and laughed for hours i will tell my teachers

  48. I’ve Loved Them

  49. #epic jokes fan // July 8, 2016 at 11:56 am // Reply

    These are epically great jokes totes need to make some more had me in fits of laughter for hours😅😆great to tel, your teachers😛😎

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